A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Yo dont text me then not text me
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
