Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Life is so much better after having sex.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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