Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
