I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize