as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
