you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
