You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Randomize
