Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
