Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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