3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
