I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Oh god it's open bar.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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