It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Randomize
