Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
When did angry sex become our thing?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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