Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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