I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
