OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
