if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
