lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
