Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(315): View more from New York

2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?

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(817): View more from Texas

I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out

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(512): View more from Texas

he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.

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(614): View more from Ohio

My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.

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(518): View more from New York

In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.

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(541): View more from Oregon

I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.

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(513): View more from Ohio

How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??

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(253): View more from Washington

I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety

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(859): View more from Kentucky

There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.

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