I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
our cab driver is having phone sex.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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