She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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