I think I am morally bankrupt
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
