everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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