if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I just saw a hot homeless man
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize