Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
