I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
