sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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