The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
