and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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