When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize