therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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