matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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