omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
