True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
