How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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