Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize
