its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
