When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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