All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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