Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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