I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
