She's JV to your varsity
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
