i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
ttyl tear gas
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
