I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
