Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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