I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
