I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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