i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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