doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Are we still banned from the library?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
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