If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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