Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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