Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
