So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
